BFF:) , (The still small voice)

so im back in Honduras..and everything feels the same .. everything seems back to normal. it feels like if the last 6/7 months have been a dream of some sort .. but the changes in me are obvious .. i feel different ..i dont feel like the same girl who left to kansas city 7 months ago.. the biggest change that i notice in myself .. I NEED JESUS.. yes I knew i needed Jesus before leaving to kansascity.. but now my dependance on him soo marked.. he makes me who I am .. he gives me life . but not only that .. He is my friend .. and not just a Good friend .. a Really.. really  close friend.. my best Friend .. and I feel the need to talk to him about everything and by everything i mean everything.. and if i dont bring it up.. He does .. and he cares .. he is a Good friend, I like Jesus .. I willingly choose his opinion on things that matter, and sometimes things you would think dont matter.. but i still ask him and he answers .. and he cares sometimes more than I do..

having Jesus as my friend.. seeing him as someone who deeply loves me .. and cares about my heart .. who wants to hear my voice ..even if its to tell him about thing you would think are dumb .. yes.. I have changed.. i loved him 6/7 months ago.. but i didnt know how to talk to him .. you could even say i was  scared/intimidated of Him not liking me .. so i always kept certain distance,out of respect ..I thought in my mind..but something changed and  it was in the prayerRoom that this happened .. we had to spend 6 hours in there ...everyday..oneday..something inside me clicked.. He wants me to talk to him... he even made it a point of saying my Voice is lovely (Songofsolomon2:14) .. so I started to talking to him the only way i knew how ..Just talking to him..Praying.. i started to notice that i was having conversations .. in my Head.. and the person i was talking to ..wasnt me .. one day it Hit me .. it felt like lighting had struck my heart.. HE WANTS TO TALK TO ME .. he speaks .. he has feelings .. and he likes to express them.. he has a heart and its not closed up.. it hit me again....I have a relationship with God..the almighty God...he likes me .. He calls me his Friend.. he Calls me his daughter..and I have acess to His heart.. i love him and he loves me ..you would think this is something i would already know .. technically i already knew this .. see I grew up learning about this .. i grew up singing about songs about Jesus loving me .. but i learned that this being  my mind wasnt really enough for it to be real to me.. for it to be a reality .. it had to be inside my heart ... when Jesus told me He loved me .. this was when i started to believe it for real.. i knew this . but my heart had never experienced this.  i was made For him.. i was made to love him back.. he loved me first... :) i love Jesus ..he is cool.. and he is a person you can be real with.. he is someone you can tell everything to , he wont be upset or surprised or angry.. see he already knows..he already know your heart.. and he sees our hearts longing for him .. since he placed that there..he is a good friend ..He is trustworthy.. he cares .. he listens .. and he wants to tell you whats on his heart.. but we have to take the time to listen.. and he waits for us to start the conversation. and Yes.. this is a conversation worth having .